Everything was going so well — then I realized something.

I’ve only had two real realizations in my life. The first was a moment cut unto itself and was wholly wondrous and beautiful; it made me see the world differently. The second broke me into bloody jigsaw pieces I have no idea how to put back together.

Every time I am reminded of it, my heart sinks. The times I manage to put it out of my mind, I feel better. But as soon as it appears, my heart sinks again; like a bathysphere torn loose from its umbilical.

Friday, 2. March, 2007 · &